Why Your Wife Will Divorce You Before October

She loves you.  She really does.  But that won’t stop her from wanting a divorce.

And it’s all your fault.  Sort of.

She will start the divorce process within the next three months because of your neglect, misunderstanding and general cluelessness.

Flickr CC Jennifer Pahlka

Flickr CC Jennifer Pahlka

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How To Be The Protector Of Her Universe

I was just starting to worry when my wife finally came home last night after 9pm.  I hadn’t heard from her since earlier in the morning and she usually calls me several times a day for one reason or another.  

I start by wondering.  Then move on to a little bit of worry.  I start looking out the window more, looking up and down the street.  Every noise get more of my attention than usual.  Every car that comes down our street.

Should I call her cell or not?  Maybe just at text to let her know I’m thinking about her.

Flickr CC Lightsurgery

Flickr CC Lightsurgery

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How To Get Through A Whole Day Without Your Wife Nagging You

I know when my wife will start nagging me.  I’ve been married to her for over 33 years.  I should know.

And when she does, I just want to run far away.

However, running away doesn’t get rid of the nagging.  It only postpones it and makes it worse.

Nagging

Flickr CC Counselman Collection

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Trusted To Lead (Duct Tape 4 of 8)

When my wife married me, she had little idea what she was getting into.  I tried to warn her.

When I proposed to her I promised her we’d probably move around more than other people did and we’d probably have less money than most.  I’m not kidding. I told her that.  She said “yes” anyway.  Maybe she thought I was kidding.  I wasn’t.

She was only 18.  I was 22. Both of us were pretty young for marriage but we made it work.  Early on, she trusted me.  Blindly.

Trust

Flickr CC Wesley Fryer

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What Is Your Deepest Desire Right Now? (Q12 of 15)

In the past year, my wife has shown a desire for several things she never had a desire for in the past.

For example, this past summer she expressed a desire to learn football and have her own team in our extended family Fantasy Football League.

She asked me a ton of questions, watched every game with me, had me research players for her, and so on.  With Matt Ryan (You read that right) as her starting quarterback for the 2013 season, she ended up winning the whole thing.  In August, I was explaining to her what “off side” and “encroachment” meant.  4 months later, she’s playing for the championship while I sit our our “post-season” in a comfortable 8th place out of 10 teams.

All I can say is that I must be the world’s greatest FF teacher.

Desire to Win

Yup, that’s a pink FF “Trophy”

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